He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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