We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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