well you can't waste a boner
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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