butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize
