i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
