I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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