Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Randomize
