just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize
