She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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