morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
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