your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
