I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
