Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
