Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
