Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize