How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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