that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
how drunk are you?
Several
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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