white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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