How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize