i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
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