2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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