I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
