dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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