butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
It's blow job season.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
