I'm sorry my penis didn't work
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
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