The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize