I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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