if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
my poor anus
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
