I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Oh god it's open bar.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
