yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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