Already got asked if we're dating
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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