what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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