found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
