today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
