Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
