We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Randomize
