My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
