Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
