TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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