you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
