I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
it's great music for shaving your balls
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
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