Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize