Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
