He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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