just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
