I queefed so loud it echoed.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
