What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Randomize
