I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
