Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Sorry about my life...
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
