She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
