so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
